Wednesday, May 23, 2018

A QUEEN IS BORN!

Like any middle-aged American woman worth her salt, I watched The Royal Wedding.  After all, most of us  were there when the ridiculously young Diana trembled her way down the aisle dressed like the Michelin Man’s illegitimate daughter. Therefore, etiquette demanded that we witness the weddings of her sons.  While some of us  might have overslept for Will and Kate's nuptials, that wasn't going to happen with this one. After all, she’s one of our own. Lest you think I’m referring to the new Duchess of Sussex, the preternatural beauty named Meghan Markle, let me correct you. I’m talking about the Mother of the Bride, the unflappable Doria Ragland.
Step aside, Bey. There's a new queen in town.

Friday, May 11, 2018

GRUMPY OLD DIVA: GROCERY STORE EDITION

One thing about being a snowbird is that if you return to your northern home the first week in April, you are in for a world of misery. There will be snow, freezing rain, grey skies, and zero plant life. That healthy lifestyle you developed down south? The daily walks on the beach, the fresh fruit, the wholesome vegetables? Kiss all that goodbye as it's all about comfort foods and strolls from the sofa to the kitchen. This is not good for one's mental well-being, people!  In fact, the entire month of April turned me into a walking Maxine cartoon. I was so grouchy from the lack of sunlight and flip-flops, that every little thing ticked me off.
Me while Snow-birding
Vs. Me back in Ohio

Friday, April 27, 2018

I'LL BE WATCHING YOU

Well folks, I received the infamous message from Facebook that I was one of the quadzillion users whose data was compromised. Apparently, thanks to a FRIEND (cough-cough) who used an app called This Is Your Digital Life, Cambridge Analytica was able to mine any and all information from my page that was set as Public. I'm sure the techs at CA enjoyed the pictures of my dog, as well as my deep thoughts regarding wine, Real Housewives, and Ohio weather.
Imagine the information they were able to glean from this profile picture, alone!

Sunday, March 18, 2018

PEG OF OUR HEARTS: THERE WERE NEVER SUCH DEVOTED SISTERS

Let me tell you the story of the Dunn Twins. Born in Ohio in1931 to parents of Irish descent, they thoughtfully arrived on March 16, leaving their father free to celebrate St. Paddy's Day. The first-born was named Patricia (Pat) and the second, Marguerite (Peg). Lest the birth order fool you, Peg decided from the beginning that she was the boss, and Pat decided to let her  believe it. Thus began a lifelong relationship of love, devotion, and some crazy games of Checkers.
"I've been waiting for you to move since 1967. Now get on with it!

Monday, January 22, 2018

THE SNOWBIRD CHRONICLES: WINTER HAS COME (AND GONE)

One problem with being a snowbird is you can't complain about the weather on social media. If you try, people up north will flag your status for "unusual cruelty."  In truth,  there is something a little silly about griping because it's 59 degrees (with a windchill of 44!!) when folks in your hometown are getting  ice cream headaches just from opening their front door. Therefore, it's important for potential Snowbirds (aka Egglings) to know what they are getting into should they spend one of the rare cold Januarys in the Sunshine State.

Don't forget your sunscreen!

Sunday, December 24, 2017

PEG OF OUR HEARTS: A CHRISTMAS STORY

I considered creating a blog about my mother, one of 5.5 million Americans diagnosed with dementia. I wondered if her struggle with the disease as well as the experiences of my sisters and myself would be helpful to others in the same position. I thought it might. Then, I wondered, "Would Mom truly want to be the subject of a blog that discusses the details of her life post-diagnosis?" That answer came to me like a coconut being dropped on my head from an angry palm tree.

Saturday, December 16, 2017

GRANDMOTHER SHOPPING WE GO

Now that I'm in my 60's and of age to be a grandmother (Tick-tock, Son. I'd like to be upright and still consuming solids when I become Granny Diva,) I am taking stock of all the Christmas gifts I used to buy for my own two. In those days, grandmothers were not treated as separate entities with distinct personalities and wants. Instead, their gifts were bought in pairs, one for each, from the Grandma Aisle at Montgomery Wards. These simple purchases might not have been glamorous, expensive, or particularly thoughtful. But, they did say, "Grandma, I bought you something," and that's all any Nana, Oma, or Nonna could ask for! Right? Let's peruse Granny's Gift Cabinet:
"I told you she took after your side."