How many times is one required to like a photograph posted to Facebook? For example, if a proud mother posts a cute picture of her children on Santa's lap, and we like that photo, must we also like the same photo when the grandmother, the aunts, and the first cousins-once-removed post the same picture? It seems to me if I've already clicked the "like" button once, I should be off the hook and not have to repeat that tedious chore over and over, again!
Dear Ms. Clutcher:
My sister has been using the same picture of her Christmas tree as her holiday cover photo for the last five years. At first, I assumed she was so OCD that she hung the Christmas ornaments in the exact position year after year. But, as the dog they put down two years ago continues to appear in the shot, I'm calling foul! This is cheating. The rest of us work very hard to frame, shoot, then filter our tasteful, yet festive, cover photos. This example of willful laziness is a blight on our family! My question is this. Would it be shallow of me to send her the same Jacquie Lawson holiday e-card year after year as a means of getting even?
You Can Call Me Petty
Dear Miss Pearl:
One of my Facebook friends simply REFUSES to go along with the "Make Baby Jesus Your Profile Picture" project! It's the most darling little endeavor begun by my sorority sisters at Ole' Miss to show our support for our troops in the trenches fighting the War On Christmas. Now, bless her heart, she is a Jew. Still, as my Mawmaw always said, "When in Rome, Georgia, do as the Rome, Georgians do!" I even reminded her that Jesus was a Jew, but that just got her britches in a twist. Miss Pearl? I have half a mind to unfriend her and her citified ways. What do you advise?
Miss Laura Belle DuPray
Oh my! This is, indeed, a pearl-clutching dilemma. Though Jesus was most certainly a Jew, and I dare say it's possible that the wise men performed a bris right there in the manger, it's a rather indelicate negotiation tactic with regards to the War On Christmas. Suggest to your friend a compromise. If she uses the Baby Jesus as her profile picture for one day, you shall, in return, host the Menorah or the Shofar as your own for a grand total of 8 days. Surely, this seems magnanimous. This is the type of Peace Treaty that will bring those in the trenches home for the holidays - all of them.
It is true that this is often a difficult time of year for many. I am going to gently suggest that before you fall to sleep this night, you self-suggest that you experience a dream in which you are visited by three ghosts. When you awaken, you will find yourself keeping Christmas very well. If that does not work, steal all the entirety of Christmas from a small town of green people, after which you will experience an epiphany which will enlarge your heart by three sizes. (Please consult a cardiologist before attempting.) If neither of these things relieve your holiday-induced outrage, Peppermint Schnapps should do the trick. Lots of it. In fact, I just might join you.
Happiest of Holidays to all who read here!