I'LL BE WATCHING YOU

Well folks, I received the infamous message from Facebook that I was one of the quadzillion users whose data was compromised. Apparently, thanks to a FRIEND (cough-cough) who used an app called This Is Your Digital Life, Cambridge Analytica was able to mine any and all information from my page that was set as Public. I'm sure the techs at CA enjoyed the pictures of my dog, as well as my deep thoughts regarding wine, Real Housewives, and Ohio weather.

Imagine the information they were able to glean from this profile picture, alone!

Look, I'm not trying to make light of something serious. (Well, actually, I am because that's kind of the way I run this blog.) But, my feeling about the situation is that we should not be surprised. We all know there's no such thing as a free lunch or social media platform. Our data has been a hot commodity ever since Publisher's Clearing House starting holding sweepstakes. I'm old enough to remember when people were outraged that publishing companies sold their subscribers addresses to direct-mail marketing firms, leading to mailboxes filled with junk mail. The next logical step was email addresses being sold to SPAM generators and Nigerian princes.

Free money! Sign me up!

Now that we are in the age when a social media presence is considered proof of life, we must acknowledge that anything we put out there for the masses will be seized upon by the marketers. None of us are so naive to think that the ads that appear in our Facebook timelines are random coincidences or some freaky message from the netherworld pointing us toward the perfect patio set.

Who knew I needed a portable sauna? Wayfair.com! That's who!

It only makes sense that if our information is going to be used to market products and websites, it will also be used to sell politics. Thanks to FB, an organization like CA can learn exactly the type of television shows supporters of a particular candidate watches, along with the type of music they listen to, the sports teams they love, their core beliefs on issues, and how vulnerable they are to persuasive Facebook posts and memes. Thanks to CA, it was almost as if we were all wearing a wire, and the campaign took heed. You really think a man like Donald Trump would be caught dead in a tractor hat if top advisers hadn't told him, "Our data shows your base is gonna love it!"

Look, none of us like that our information was shared and will continue to be, but we've got some choices. We can all just shut down our social media accounts. (Insert shouts of horror, here) Short of that, we can be smart users. Here's a few tips from a computer security specialist me, who studied data mining extensively read an article on Buzzfeed. So, pay attention, kids!

A. Stay Inside! No more public posts! Starting now, make a vow that all your posts will be set to "friends only." The only information CA obtained from me was that which I made public. Because I had not played a game or opened a nefarious link on Facebook, the data grabbers could only go so far into my information. Anything set for "friends only" was safe-guarded. Of course, they were still able to learn that I'm over-age, over-weight, and overly invested in reality TV shows.

Actual footage of the Russian assigned to document my data.

B. Avoid Public Places! Your friends might still like to post Public statuses. It's their prerogative, so, it's up to you to use discretion and proceed with caution. The other information CA was able to garner from my Facebook activity came from the public posts to which I responded. While I keep my statuses locked down, my replies to Public statuses were free for the grabbing.

C. Stop Taking Your Friends Out In Public! If your friend's post is set to "friend's only," do not ask them to make it public so you can share. Facebook very wisely locked down the Share button so it could only be used on public posts. If you feel the need to share a picture of your grandchildren or a video from a night out with friends, do things the old-fashioned way. First, ask permission. Then, if so granted, copy the photo/video, then paste to your own status (but keep it "friends only.") The only exception to that rule is my links to this blog. Share away. Maybe the Russians will appreciate my humor more than my fellow Americans and I'll go viral in Siberia!

"Nyet!"

D. No One Cares How Smart You Are. If you were able to graduate from high school, or even middle school, you will do well on the click-bait quizzes. Though they can be fun and entertaining, the truth is, not a single one of your friends cares that you scored 9 out of 10 on the 70's TV Theme Songs Quiz. Nor do we care which Berenstain Bear you are. If you MUST do the quizzes, take them outside, please. Some of us are allergic. How to do this? Google the name of the quiz, i.e. "Which Kind of Soup Am I?" The site pops up, you answer the questions, get your results, screen cap and post, and your friends say, "I can't wait to find out if I'm a consomme' or a bisque." Remember, these quizzes are designed for data mining, which, when taken via Facebook, can include the list of all of your friends. Let's all change our habits in that regard and be good neighbors!

E. No More Wicked Games! The very games you play via Facebook are available through the app store on your phone or computer. The difference is that when you play games outside of Facebook, you aren't making your account or your friends' vulnerable. Also, let's face it. The temptation to buy extra turns or special helpers is great, which means providing a credit card to purchase such. I ask you. Would you rather Facebook have access to that card, or your App store? Neither? Fair enough. Personally, I'd rather give my credit card number to a Nigerian Prince than any social media app. So, crush all the candy, let the angry birds kill the piggies, and bejewel yourself like Liz Taylor. But, do it outside where you won't risk harming your friends' accounts. Also, not to brag, but I rock at Candy Crush.

The bottom line is, if you follow the few simple rules I've outlined, it will help keep you protected. Now, go get your social media on...but, be careful out there!